Are you kidding me, if you don't play with it when I'm finished, I'm gonna take it as a personal offense. This is ours. [ he's not just building this for himself, it's for hank and cisco too, and jim - if he needs it. ]
["ours". He looks taken aback for a moment before he grins; he'd forgotten what it was like to have friends his age (younger than him now, but it that's not important)]
[ it's going to take them a while, he knows, to regain their rhythm. but it still hurts. he and hank were about as in-sync as two people can be, and the thought of losing that is terrifying. ]
[are you prepared for a ton of apologies? Because Winn is going to get so many apologies. He knows he's off now, and he doesn't know how that'll be once his head settles and life returns to some semblance of normal]
Right. Dibs on playing with it before Cisco. [because even if ten years have passed, he still has his moments of immaturity. He hasn't changed that much.
But he does sigh and sit back, and takes off his glasses to drag a hand down his face. He feels a little less likely to burst now]
I have nothing to show you, but I did build a few things back home - another jet, and - there's the Danger Room. [that sounds safe. He huffs, actually disappointed he can't show Winn any of it] And then rebuilt the one, but that's a - long story.
[ he's not prepared for apologies. he is, however, prepared for how much it's going to hurt for them to even feel needed by either of them. ]
You got it. [ because hank is hurting and winn would give him anything if it'll cheer him up even a fraction.
sitting by hank's side, he tries his best to find some sort of balance between being gentle and not making hank feel like he's treating him like a ticking bomb. he knows what that treatment feels like, and he hates being on the receiving end of it. ]
That sounds awesome - what's the Danger Room? [ that at least feels like a safe (get it?) question to ask. ]
[if only Winn knew how much Hank needs him, Hank just sucks at showing it, at all, ever.
That and he doesn't want to dump Apocalypse on him because no one in their right mind deserves that]
It's a training room for the X-Men. The walls are all - . . . well, everything-proof, more or less, and I have things built into the walls to act as a sort of obstacle course. I can change it up depending on who's in there, since everyone's powers are different.
[and a pause]
And I might've rebuilt a sentinel for training purposes.
[ apocalypse has been dumped on him, just in a different timeline. where everything got destroyed and his girlfriend is dead and everyone is dead and everything sucks. ]
-- what are the walls made of? [ in quiet admiration.
the word sentinel, though, is rewarded by an obvious clenching. just imagining what hank has had to go through in that decade is killing him. ]
So robotics, now, too? Our little geezer's growing up. [ look he's trying. ]
[he huffs] You can call me old, but not a geezer. I have to draw a line somewhere.
They're made of steel, and a couple of other things. [he lists off a few materials, who even knows what they are thanks movies] It's only been finished for a couple of weeks, but so far it's been doing a good job of holding up.
But yeah - robotics, too. Since - the X-Men are officially a thing now.
[ he pats his arm, being intentionally obnoxious to lighten the mood. he whistles at that list of materials, it's a very impressive list of materials! ]
That's badass - hey, congratulations.
[ he knows the reasons why they need to exists all basically amount to because the world sucks, but it's still great they exist. he knows how much the team means to them. he knows how much being a part of team supergirl means to him. ]
Wow, I'm not that old. Save that for the real old men.
[he appreciates it. He and Charles did the same thing, immediately bickering with one another rather than voicing their concerns. It had helped a lot.
His smile turns a little bittersweet, but it's still there all the same] Thanks. The other X-Men are a couple of our students, but - they're incredibly impressive. Not - that all of my students aren't impressive, but -
Being a superhero kind of pushes it to a new level of impressive. [ he nods. much the same way as his intelligence is impressive, sure, but kara saves lives. ] Are your students okay?
[ it's the first real question he's asked, but he feels like it's warranted. he needs to know just how worried he needs to be about hank. ]
It - yeah, it really does. [it's the first time he hasn't denied the superhero part. He kind of can't now.
The question gives him pause, and he could lie. He could lie outright, but he decides not to. Because it'll bite him in the ass later, and . . . he needs to talk about something]
They're . . . getting there. I mean, they're - physically alright, but what happened effected all of the students. So it's mostly a . . . day by day thing. It's been a few weeks now, but some things still . . . sort of linger.
he notes that difference and while he's happy that hank finally accepts it - it's terrifying to think what it would have taken to get him there.
the vagueness isn't helping his dying of worry over here. ]
I'm glad they're...physically alright. [ he sighs, running his fingers through his hair. how to say what he needs to say without seeming like he's pushing? he doesn't want to push hank into talking about something he doesn't want to, but he doesn't want hank not to talk about something he does need to talk about out of concern for his well being. it's something all superheroes seem to do (it's something he does, too) and yet he still hasn't learned how to address it. ] Hank look if - if you want to talk about what happened, I just want you to know you can. You don't need to spare me. [ he smiles a small, humorless smile ] I'm tougher than I look. [ he's had to deal with so much since he got to the fleet, and he's still standing, isn't he? ]
I know. [he looks at Winn before he glances down at his hands, clenching in his lap] It's not - it's not that I don't think you can handle it.
[it's that it's so fresh in his mind despite being weeks ago that even thinking too long about it makes it hard to breathe, makes it so he wants to go hover around Charles and Raven and even Erik until he can shove the panic back down.
He doesn't want to go into details. He doesn't want relive Cairo all over again, like he'd done as soon as he'd woken up. He doesn't want to see Winn's reaction to a single name that would explain everything all too clearly.
So, he settles on a compromise]
We - I - we almost lost everything. Charles, Raven, Peter - Erik - [in a way, briefly, they had] We - did lose Alex, because he's an idiot— [his throat tightens up and he shakes his head. That's one particular part he hadn't dealt with back home and he certainly wasn't ready to do it here]
I can't - I can't talk about all of it just yet. But I promise - when I can, I will. When I get my head on straight.
[ you're just going to get pulled into the tightest hug winn can give you right now, hank. he doesn't need to know the details - he just needs hank to know that he can tell them, if he needs to. ]
[ he's not letting go until hank does. if anyone deserves hugs right now, it's his friend. ]
You got nothing to be sorry for. [ he's sure hank did everything that was humanly - and mutantly - possible back home. and what's happened here - is completely out of his hands. ]
We'll settle our score one day. [ the atroma is gonna get it. ]
Neither do you. [but that's how it always is; you know you did everything possible and yet it still feels like you could've done more. Like if he'd been just a little faster at grabbing Alex&mdash]
I know we will. I'm looking forward to it. [he's very, very tired of these "superior beings" messing with them. He's had his fill thank you]
[ he gives his shoulder another pat before properly letting go, look winn has an endless supply of hugs you don't have to worry about them running out. ]
Take your time. [ he took a break from it too, after his attack. sometimes you just need to stop and cope. ] And if there's anything I can do in the meantime - for you or anyone [ he and charles never really seem to manage to get along right, but he does care. ] - let me know.
[they will run out after that conversation, or at least temporarily deplete]
Thanks. [he feels a little bad because even if there was something that could be done, he doesn't know what it is. This wasn't the same as back home, where they'd had day after day to slowly learn to cope. No, it had all been shoved into their heads instead.
. . . ]
Give it a few days and send Charles a message? Just - to check in on him.
[ they will never run out. in fact, hank may have to walk around with a winn attached forever. ]
Will do. [ he nods ] I -- picked up a couple of books on the planet. I was gonna donate them to the library after I'm done reading but honestly that might be a while, I've got too much work for reading. Do you wanna maybe -- take them? For you and Charles - and Raven and Erik, if they're also readers? [ so they'd have something to do if they need a distraction but don't feel like leaving or dealing with people, is what he's thinking. ]
[that's perfectly fine with him that means he's within protecting distance]
Thank you. [books would be a good distraction - Charles likes to read, anyway, and having something to read while he camps outside of the room would be nice. He nods after a moment] I don't know about Raven or Erik, but I know Charles would appreciate it. I would, too.
. . . [he sighs out, a little wry] Since I doubt we'll be going very far from the Heron anytime soon.
[ winn wouldn't complain about being within protecting distance, either. he's had too many close calls lately.
patting his shoulder again he nods. ]
They're in my room, I'll get them for you before you head back. I've got some science, some history, and one short stories just for the heck of it. If you need me to get more, or run any errands for you - I'm just a comm call away.
[ for hank and charles and their friends - he will brave the iskaulit again. and he's on the planet a lot so picking stuff up there is easy. ]
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momijizukamori and
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 03:37 am (UTC)[ shaking his head. ]
Are you kidding me, if you don't play with it when I'm finished, I'm gonna take it as a personal offense. This is ours. [ he's not just building this for himself, it's for hank and cisco too, and jim - if he needs it. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 03:46 am (UTC)Well, I wouldn't want to offend you.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 03:51 am (UTC)There you go, then, you're playing with it.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 03:58 am (UTC)Right. Dibs on playing with it before Cisco. [because even if ten years have passed, he still has his moments of immaturity. He hasn't changed that much.
But he does sigh and sit back, and takes off his glasses to drag a hand down his face. He feels a little less likely to burst now]
I have nothing to show you, but I did build a few things back home - another jet, and - there's the Danger Room. [that sounds safe. He huffs, actually disappointed he can't show Winn any of it] And then rebuilt the one, but that's a - long story.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 04:04 am (UTC)You got it. [ because hank is hurting and winn would give him anything if it'll cheer him up even a fraction.
sitting by hank's side, he tries his best to find some sort of balance between being gentle and not making hank feel like he's treating him like a ticking bomb. he knows what that treatment feels like, and he hates being on the receiving end of it. ]
That sounds awesome - what's the Danger Room? [ that at least feels like a safe (get it?) question to ask. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 04:11 am (UTC)That and he doesn't want to dump Apocalypse on him because no one in their right mind deserves that]
It's a training room for the X-Men. The walls are all - . . . well, everything-proof, more or less, and I have things built into the walls to act as a sort of obstacle course. I can change it up depending on who's in there, since everyone's powers are different.
[and a pause]
And I might've rebuilt a sentinel for training purposes.
[y'know, as you do]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 04:18 am (UTC)-- what are the walls made of? [ in quiet admiration.
the word sentinel, though, is rewarded by an obvious clenching. just imagining what hank has had to go through in that decade is killing him. ]
So robotics, now, too? Our little geezer's growing up. [ look he's trying. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 04:23 am (UTC)They're made of steel, and a couple of other things. [he lists off a few materials, who even knows what they are thanks movies] It's only been finished for a couple of weeks, but so far it's been doing a good job of holding up.
But yeah - robotics, too. Since - the X-Men are officially a thing now.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 04:30 am (UTC)[ he pats his arm, being intentionally obnoxious to lighten the mood. he whistles at that list of materials, it's a very impressive list of materials! ]
That's badass - hey, congratulations.
[ he knows the reasons why they need to exists all basically amount to because the world sucks, but it's still great they exist. he knows how much the team means to them. he knows how much being a part of team supergirl means to him. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 04:35 am (UTC)[he appreciates it. He and Charles did the same thing, immediately bickering with one another rather than voicing their concerns. It had helped a lot.
His smile turns a little bittersweet, but it's still there all the same] Thanks. The other X-Men are a couple of our students, but - they're incredibly impressive. Not - that all of my students aren't impressive, but -
They've . . . sort of earned it.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 04:42 am (UTC)[ he'd do anything for hank. ]
Being a superhero kind of pushes it to a new level of impressive. [ he nods. much the same way as his intelligence is impressive, sure, but kara saves lives. ] Are your students okay?
[ it's the first real question he's asked, but he feels like it's warranted. he needs to know just how worried he needs to be about hank. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 05:00 am (UTC)[and he would do anything for Winn]
It - yeah, it really does. [it's the first time he hasn't denied the superhero part. He kind of can't now.
The question gives him pause, and he could lie. He could lie outright, but he decides not to. Because it'll bite him in the ass later, and . . . he needs to talk about something]
They're . . . getting there. I mean, they're - physically alright, but what happened effected all of the students. So it's mostly a . . . day by day thing. It's been a few weeks now, but some things still . . . sort of linger.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 05:08 am (UTC)[ he's way more immature, please.
he notes that difference and while he's happy that hank finally accepts it - it's terrifying to think what it would have taken to get him there.
the vagueness isn't helping his dying of worry over here. ]
I'm glad they're...physically alright. [ he sighs, running his fingers through his hair. how to say what he needs to say without seeming like he's pushing? he doesn't want to push hank into talking about something he doesn't want to, but he doesn't want hank not to talk about something he does need to talk about out of concern for his well being. it's something all superheroes seem to do (it's something he does, too) and yet he still hasn't learned how to address it. ] Hank look if - if you want to talk about what happened, I just want you to know you can. You don't need to spare me. [ he smiles a small, humorless smile ] I'm tougher than I look. [ he's had to deal with so much since he got to the fleet, and he's still standing, isn't he? ]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 05:21 am (UTC)[it's that it's so fresh in his mind despite being weeks ago that even thinking too long about it makes it hard to breathe, makes it so he wants to go hover around Charles and Raven and even Erik until he can shove the panic back down.
He doesn't want to go into details. He doesn't want relive Cairo all over again, like he'd done as soon as he'd woken up. He doesn't want to see Winn's reaction to a single name that would explain everything all too clearly.
So, he settles on a compromise]
We - I - we almost lost everything. Charles, Raven, Peter - Erik - [in a way, briefly, they had] We - did lose Alex, because he's an idiot— [his throat tightens up and he shakes his head. That's one particular part he hadn't dealt with back home and he certainly wasn't ready to do it here]
I can't - I can't talk about all of it just yet. But I promise - when I can, I will. When I get my head on straight.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 05:24 am (UTC)I'm so sorry.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 05:29 am (UTC)I am, too.
[he huffs out a weak noise, and there's a hint of something in it that's almost petulant, like how he once was about certain things]
I feel like I saw you last week and ten years ago at the same time. I hate this.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 05:33 am (UTC)You got nothing to be sorry for. [ he's sure hank did everything that was humanly - and mutantly - possible back home. and what's happened here - is completely out of his hands. ]
We'll settle our score one day. [ the atroma is gonna get it. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 05:35 am (UTC)Neither do you. [but that's how it always is; you know you did everything possible and yet it still feels like you could've done more. Like if he'd been just a little faster at grabbing Alex&mdash]
I know we will. I'm looking forward to it. [he's very, very tired of these "superior beings" messing with them. He's had his fill thank you]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 05:39 am (UTC)Me too. It's gonna be a good day.
[ he's so over the superior overlords messing with their lives for the sake of cheap entertainment. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 05:44 am (UTC)Dear lord]
As soon as I'm - sorted out, I'll get back to helping you figure it all out.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 05:48 am (UTC)Take your time. [ he took a break from it too, after his attack. sometimes you just need to stop and cope. ] And if there's anything I can do in the meantime - for you or anyone [ he and charles never really seem to manage to get along right, but he does care. ] - let me know.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 05:55 am (UTC)Thanks. [he feels a little bad because even if there was something that could be done, he doesn't know what it is. This wasn't the same as back home, where they'd had day after day to slowly learn to cope. No, it had all been shoved into their heads instead.
. . . ]
Give it a few days and send Charles a message? Just - to check in on him.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 06:00 am (UTC)Will do. [ he nods ] I -- picked up a couple of books on the planet. I was gonna donate them to the library after I'm done reading but honestly that might be a while, I've got too much work for reading. Do you wanna maybe -- take them? For you and Charles - and Raven and Erik, if they're also readers? [ so they'd have something to do if they need a distraction but don't feel like leaving or dealing with people, is what he's thinking. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 06:05 am (UTC)Thank you. [books would be a good distraction - Charles likes to read, anyway, and having something to read while he camps outside of the room would be nice. He nods after a moment] I don't know about Raven or Erik, but I know Charles would appreciate it. I would, too.
. . . [he sighs out, a little wry] Since I doubt we'll be going very far from the Heron anytime soon.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 06:09 am (UTC)patting his shoulder again he nods. ]
They're in my room, I'll get them for you before you head back. I've got some science, some history, and one short stories just for the heck of it. If you need me to get more, or run any errands for you - I'm just a comm call away.
[ for hank and charles and their friends - he will brave the iskaulit again. and he's on the planet a lot so picking stuff up there is easy. ]
Do you have decent food up there?
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