Wow, I'm not that old. Save that for the real old men.
[he appreciates it. He and Charles did the same thing, immediately bickering with one another rather than voicing their concerns. It had helped a lot.
His smile turns a little bittersweet, but it's still there all the same] Thanks. The other X-Men are a couple of our students, but - they're incredibly impressive. Not - that all of my students aren't impressive, but -
Being a superhero kind of pushes it to a new level of impressive. [ he nods. much the same way as his intelligence is impressive, sure, but kara saves lives. ] Are your students okay?
[ it's the first real question he's asked, but he feels like it's warranted. he needs to know just how worried he needs to be about hank. ]
It - yeah, it really does. [it's the first time he hasn't denied the superhero part. He kind of can't now.
The question gives him pause, and he could lie. He could lie outright, but he decides not to. Because it'll bite him in the ass later, and . . . he needs to talk about something]
They're . . . getting there. I mean, they're - physically alright, but what happened effected all of the students. So it's mostly a . . . day by day thing. It's been a few weeks now, but some things still . . . sort of linger.
he notes that difference and while he's happy that hank finally accepts it - it's terrifying to think what it would have taken to get him there.
the vagueness isn't helping his dying of worry over here. ]
I'm glad they're...physically alright. [ he sighs, running his fingers through his hair. how to say what he needs to say without seeming like he's pushing? he doesn't want to push hank into talking about something he doesn't want to, but he doesn't want hank not to talk about something he does need to talk about out of concern for his well being. it's something all superheroes seem to do (it's something he does, too) and yet he still hasn't learned how to address it. ] Hank look if - if you want to talk about what happened, I just want you to know you can. You don't need to spare me. [ he smiles a small, humorless smile ] I'm tougher than I look. [ he's had to deal with so much since he got to the fleet, and he's still standing, isn't he? ]
I know. [he looks at Winn before he glances down at his hands, clenching in his lap] It's not - it's not that I don't think you can handle it.
[it's that it's so fresh in his mind despite being weeks ago that even thinking too long about it makes it hard to breathe, makes it so he wants to go hover around Charles and Raven and even Erik until he can shove the panic back down.
He doesn't want to go into details. He doesn't want relive Cairo all over again, like he'd done as soon as he'd woken up. He doesn't want to see Winn's reaction to a single name that would explain everything all too clearly.
So, he settles on a compromise]
We - I - we almost lost everything. Charles, Raven, Peter - Erik - [in a way, briefly, they had] We - did lose Alex, because he's an idiot— [his throat tightens up and he shakes his head. That's one particular part he hadn't dealt with back home and he certainly wasn't ready to do it here]
I can't - I can't talk about all of it just yet. But I promise - when I can, I will. When I get my head on straight.
[ you're just going to get pulled into the tightest hug winn can give you right now, hank. he doesn't need to know the details - he just needs hank to know that he can tell them, if he needs to. ]
[ he's not letting go until hank does. if anyone deserves hugs right now, it's his friend. ]
You got nothing to be sorry for. [ he's sure hank did everything that was humanly - and mutantly - possible back home. and what's happened here - is completely out of his hands. ]
We'll settle our score one day. [ the atroma is gonna get it. ]
Neither do you. [but that's how it always is; you know you did everything possible and yet it still feels like you could've done more. Like if he'd been just a little faster at grabbing Alex&mdash]
I know we will. I'm looking forward to it. [he's very, very tired of these "superior beings" messing with them. He's had his fill thank you]
[ he gives his shoulder another pat before properly letting go, look winn has an endless supply of hugs you don't have to worry about them running out. ]
Take your time. [ he took a break from it too, after his attack. sometimes you just need to stop and cope. ] And if there's anything I can do in the meantime - for you or anyone [ he and charles never really seem to manage to get along right, but he does care. ] - let me know.
[they will run out after that conversation, or at least temporarily deplete]
Thanks. [he feels a little bad because even if there was something that could be done, he doesn't know what it is. This wasn't the same as back home, where they'd had day after day to slowly learn to cope. No, it had all been shoved into their heads instead.
. . . ]
Give it a few days and send Charles a message? Just - to check in on him.
[ they will never run out. in fact, hank may have to walk around with a winn attached forever. ]
Will do. [ he nods ] I -- picked up a couple of books on the planet. I was gonna donate them to the library after I'm done reading but honestly that might be a while, I've got too much work for reading. Do you wanna maybe -- take them? For you and Charles - and Raven and Erik, if they're also readers? [ so they'd have something to do if they need a distraction but don't feel like leaving or dealing with people, is what he's thinking. ]
[that's perfectly fine with him that means he's within protecting distance]
Thank you. [books would be a good distraction - Charles likes to read, anyway, and having something to read while he camps outside of the room would be nice. He nods after a moment] I don't know about Raven or Erik, but I know Charles would appreciate it. I would, too.
. . . [he sighs out, a little wry] Since I doubt we'll be going very far from the Heron anytime soon.
[ winn wouldn't complain about being within protecting distance, either. he's had too many close calls lately.
patting his shoulder again he nods. ]
They're in my room, I'll get them for you before you head back. I've got some science, some history, and one short stories just for the heck of it. If you need me to get more, or run any errands for you - I'm just a comm call away.
[ for hank and charles and their friends - he will brave the iskaulit again. and he's on the planet a lot so picking stuff up there is easy. ]
I'm not going to ask you to run errands for us - but I appreciate the offer. [he remembers how Winn feels about the shuttles, and flying, and he doubts there's much they'd need in the first place.
He frowns in thought for a moment before he shrugs]
Erik cooked a lot, so I imagine he's made sure there's decent enough food.
Ask me, it's fine. I'm planet-side a lot I can pick up whatever you need.
[ yeah he doesn't love the shuttles or flying, but he's gotten used to it. he does it. he does it for lesser reasons than helping out friends, so of course he'll do it for hank. ]
Well if you need any groceries or just - anything. Games - uh, Margaery made me a deck of cards - you can take that if you want.
It's - we're still on the planets with the factions, aren't we? [he remembers that much. Or more like, he remembers how much he hated the thought of factions.
That sure hasn't changed]
I don't - think we need anything, but I'll - let me gauge how everyone is and maybe then I'll - think a little more on it.
[ WINN WOULD BE SO EXCITED FOR HIM IF HE GOT IT HIMSELF
well, actually winn was referring to their friends on the fleet who all seemed to be waking up and glitch-free these past few days. but sure, that too. ]
Yeah, that's still just as dumb as it was the day we landed. On the bright side though, it's still not violent, at least.
[ he was pretty worried when margaery took him to moxie territory, ok, one look at him is all it takes to see that he's spirit regardless of what he's wearing (though his general fondness for wearing blue wasn't helping his case any either). ]
But yes that too. Once these new worries settles he'll jump right back into the old ones]
Not yet, you mean. [he'd agreed with Erik, for once, on that not lasting long, and after everything back home - well, that hasn't changed a bit] I guess it's in my favor, for once, that I don't plan on going down there anytime soon. I still don't want anything to do with that nonsense.
[ IT'S THE ATROMA HANK, IT'S TAKEN HIS POP CULTURE KNOWLEDGE AND HE WILL TAKE HIS REVENGE! ]
I'd like to hope that with all their love of logic and honor and survival, they'll figure out that division and war's in no one's best interest before it ever comes to that. [ it's naive and even he knows it, but if they're real people and not virtual creations, he has to have faith they'll find their way to the right path. he refuses to let the atroma change him, he wants to be the kind of person who sees the best in people. ]
[HOW DARE THEY, you can't take a nerd's pop culture they THRIVE ON IT]
I'm hoping for that too, but - I see it for what it is as well. [and he looks a little guilty about it, but the experience he was drawing on is now an older memory, one so far removed from his current life that it's strange to be going back to it again]
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momijizukamori and
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Date: 2016-09-04 04:35 am (UTC)[he appreciates it. He and Charles did the same thing, immediately bickering with one another rather than voicing their concerns. It had helped a lot.
His smile turns a little bittersweet, but it's still there all the same] Thanks. The other X-Men are a couple of our students, but - they're incredibly impressive. Not - that all of my students aren't impressive, but -
They've . . . sort of earned it.
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Date: 2016-09-04 04:42 am (UTC)[ he'd do anything for hank. ]
Being a superhero kind of pushes it to a new level of impressive. [ he nods. much the same way as his intelligence is impressive, sure, but kara saves lives. ] Are your students okay?
[ it's the first real question he's asked, but he feels like it's warranted. he needs to know just how worried he needs to be about hank. ]
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Date: 2016-09-04 05:00 am (UTC)[and he would do anything for Winn]
It - yeah, it really does. [it's the first time he hasn't denied the superhero part. He kind of can't now.
The question gives him pause, and he could lie. He could lie outright, but he decides not to. Because it'll bite him in the ass later, and . . . he needs to talk about something]
They're . . . getting there. I mean, they're - physically alright, but what happened effected all of the students. So it's mostly a . . . day by day thing. It's been a few weeks now, but some things still . . . sort of linger.
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Date: 2016-09-04 05:08 am (UTC)[ he's way more immature, please.
he notes that difference and while he's happy that hank finally accepts it - it's terrifying to think what it would have taken to get him there.
the vagueness isn't helping his dying of worry over here. ]
I'm glad they're...physically alright. [ he sighs, running his fingers through his hair. how to say what he needs to say without seeming like he's pushing? he doesn't want to push hank into talking about something he doesn't want to, but he doesn't want hank not to talk about something he does need to talk about out of concern for his well being. it's something all superheroes seem to do (it's something he does, too) and yet he still hasn't learned how to address it. ] Hank look if - if you want to talk about what happened, I just want you to know you can. You don't need to spare me. [ he smiles a small, humorless smile ] I'm tougher than I look. [ he's had to deal with so much since he got to the fleet, and he's still standing, isn't he? ]
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Date: 2016-09-04 05:21 am (UTC)[it's that it's so fresh in his mind despite being weeks ago that even thinking too long about it makes it hard to breathe, makes it so he wants to go hover around Charles and Raven and even Erik until he can shove the panic back down.
He doesn't want to go into details. He doesn't want relive Cairo all over again, like he'd done as soon as he'd woken up. He doesn't want to see Winn's reaction to a single name that would explain everything all too clearly.
So, he settles on a compromise]
We - I - we almost lost everything. Charles, Raven, Peter - Erik - [in a way, briefly, they had] We - did lose Alex, because he's an idiot— [his throat tightens up and he shakes his head. That's one particular part he hadn't dealt with back home and he certainly wasn't ready to do it here]
I can't - I can't talk about all of it just yet. But I promise - when I can, I will. When I get my head on straight.
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Date: 2016-09-04 05:24 am (UTC)I'm so sorry.
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Date: 2016-09-04 05:29 am (UTC)I am, too.
[he huffs out a weak noise, and there's a hint of something in it that's almost petulant, like how he once was about certain things]
I feel like I saw you last week and ten years ago at the same time. I hate this.
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Date: 2016-09-04 05:33 am (UTC)You got nothing to be sorry for. [ he's sure hank did everything that was humanly - and mutantly - possible back home. and what's happened here - is completely out of his hands. ]
We'll settle our score one day. [ the atroma is gonna get it. ]
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Date: 2016-09-04 05:35 am (UTC)Neither do you. [but that's how it always is; you know you did everything possible and yet it still feels like you could've done more. Like if he'd been just a little faster at grabbing Alex&mdash]
I know we will. I'm looking forward to it. [he's very, very tired of these "superior beings" messing with them. He's had his fill thank you]
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Date: 2016-09-04 05:39 am (UTC)Me too. It's gonna be a good day.
[ he's so over the superior overlords messing with their lives for the sake of cheap entertainment. ]
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Date: 2016-09-04 05:44 am (UTC)Dear lord]
As soon as I'm - sorted out, I'll get back to helping you figure it all out.
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Date: 2016-09-04 05:48 am (UTC)Take your time. [ he took a break from it too, after his attack. sometimes you just need to stop and cope. ] And if there's anything I can do in the meantime - for you or anyone [ he and charles never really seem to manage to get along right, but he does care. ] - let me know.
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Date: 2016-09-04 05:55 am (UTC)Thanks. [he feels a little bad because even if there was something that could be done, he doesn't know what it is. This wasn't the same as back home, where they'd had day after day to slowly learn to cope. No, it had all been shoved into their heads instead.
. . . ]
Give it a few days and send Charles a message? Just - to check in on him.
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Date: 2016-09-04 06:00 am (UTC)Will do. [ he nods ] I -- picked up a couple of books on the planet. I was gonna donate them to the library after I'm done reading but honestly that might be a while, I've got too much work for reading. Do you wanna maybe -- take them? For you and Charles - and Raven and Erik, if they're also readers? [ so they'd have something to do if they need a distraction but don't feel like leaving or dealing with people, is what he's thinking. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 06:05 am (UTC)Thank you. [books would be a good distraction - Charles likes to read, anyway, and having something to read while he camps outside of the room would be nice. He nods after a moment] I don't know about Raven or Erik, but I know Charles would appreciate it. I would, too.
. . . [he sighs out, a little wry] Since I doubt we'll be going very far from the Heron anytime soon.
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 06:09 am (UTC)patting his shoulder again he nods. ]
They're in my room, I'll get them for you before you head back. I've got some science, some history, and one short stories just for the heck of it. If you need me to get more, or run any errands for you - I'm just a comm call away.
[ for hank and charles and their friends - he will brave the iskaulit again. and he's on the planet a lot so picking stuff up there is easy. ]
Do you have decent food up there?
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Date: 2016-09-04 06:13 am (UTC)I'm not going to ask you to run errands for us - but I appreciate the offer. [he remembers how Winn feels about the shuttles, and flying, and he doubts there's much they'd need in the first place.
He frowns in thought for a moment before he shrugs]
Erik cooked a lot, so I imagine he's made sure there's decent enough food.
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Date: 2016-09-04 06:17 am (UTC)Ask me, it's fine. I'm planet-side a lot I can pick up whatever you need.
[ yeah he doesn't love the shuttles or flying, but he's gotten used to it. he does it. he does it for lesser reasons than helping out friends, so of course he'll do it for hank. ]
Well if you need any groceries or just - anything. Games - uh, Margaery made me a deck of cards - you can take that if you want.
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Date: 2016-09-04 06:30 am (UTC)It's - we're still on the planets with the factions, aren't we? [he remembers that much. Or more like, he remembers how much he hated the thought of factions.
That sure hasn't changed]
I don't - think we need anything, but I'll - let me gauge how everyone is and maybe then I'll - think a little more on it.
[current gauge: hot mess]
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Date: 2016-09-04 06:33 am (UTC)he nods, in answer to both. ]
Yeah, yeah, of course. And don't worry about catching up with here, as far as I know at least - you didn't miss anything.
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Date: 2016-09-04 06:53 am (UTC)You mean I didn't miss out on the factions and the stupidity of it all? I'm so relieved.
[it's so deadpan]
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Date: 2016-09-04 06:59 am (UTC)well, actually winn was referring to their friends on the fleet who all seemed to be waking up and glitch-free these past few days. but sure, that too. ]
Yeah, that's still just as dumb as it was the day we landed. On the bright side though, it's still not violent, at least.
[ he was pretty worried when margaery took him to moxie territory, ok, one look at him is all it takes to see that he's spirit regardless of what he's wearing (though his general fondness for wearing blue wasn't helping his case any either). ]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 07:15 am (UTC)But yes that too. Once these new worries settles he'll jump right back into the old ones]
Not yet, you mean. [he'd agreed with Erik, for once, on that not lasting long, and after everything back home - well, that hasn't changed a bit] I guess it's in my favor, for once, that I don't plan on going down there anytime soon. I still don't want anything to do with that nonsense.
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Date: 2016-09-04 07:20 am (UTC)I'd like to hope that with all their love of logic and honor and survival, they'll figure out that division and war's in no one's best interest before it ever comes to that. [ it's naive and even he knows it, but if they're real people and not virtual creations, he has to have faith they'll find their way to the right path. he refuses to let the atroma change him, he wants to be the kind of person who sees the best in people. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-09-04 07:35 am (UTC)I'm hoping for that too, but - I see it for what it is as well. [and he looks a little guilty about it, but the experience he was drawing on is now an older memory, one so far removed from his current life that it's strange to be going back to it again]
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