[ it's curt, but he also really means it. he doesn't enjoy being difficult. he wishes he could be over his barriers, that he could speak freely. but if he could do that, he wouldn't need these talks. he hates being a bother, but it seems like he can't help but be one around jim. ]
[ He knows. He really does know, and he hopes that Winn can bring down more of those walls, but it will take time. Which is why he doesn't mind these talks and being someone Winn can come talk to. And hopes that Winn doesn't mind that he pushes him. It's only out of love, wanting him to grow. ]
Yeah, well, make it up to me by running an extra twenty minutes next lesson.
[ He gave him a teasing smile. ]
And by coming to me next time rather than having me drag you in.
[ he weakly attempts a joke. he's tried coming to jim - he came after charles, he came after sascha. but he can't guarantee he'll come next time, or the time after that. it all depends on how vulnerable the subject makes him feel, how comfortable he is with voicing it. ]
[ he nods a little. these talks are hard, they're painful, and sometimes they make him feel terrible - because they show him just how far he still has to climb to be the kind of man he wishes he were. but they're good for him. they help. ]
Thanks for not giving up on me.
[ he knows he's giving him plenty of reasons to. but it's that very reason that made him so attached to jim. he doesn't give him anything but friendship in return, jim doesn't need him to make anything for him, do anything for him, and he still cares. it means the world to him, and little by little, he's starting to believe that it can stay that way, it can hold, that hanging around him can be incentive enough to hang around him. ]
You keep thanking me for that, but you don't have to, you know. I'm not in
the habit of giving up on my friends.
[ He gave him an encouraging smile as he drained his glass, reaching
for the bottle to refill it - a half measure, this time, rather than the
full, though he was nowhere near drunk or even tipsy at this point. ]
Now, what do you need moving forward? Do you have lube? What about condoms?
This is me making sure you have what you need to have a good time and stay
safe. You've never been with a guy - until now - and it's different and
since you probably won't ask me, I decided to offer.
[ If he was Bones, Remy, or Spock he would have laughed and joked. But
Winn was his friend, in a different way from those two. He was protective
of him, very much in the sense of a little brother, so these things came
out. ]
[ well, if you're going to be all serious and considerate like that, he supposes he can try (remember, he only thought try!!! there are no promises here!!!) to be mature. ]
We're both healthy and we're always safe. [ look the atroma is weird and they can do crazy things to bodies and basically he is taking no chances here. ]
[ it's hard to enjoy when it's scary and confusing, and worst of all - wasn't consensual. this transformation was forced on kitty, and as much as they try to make the best out of it, that doesn't change. ]
I'll try, but, you know, old habits. [ trying for a little smile ]
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
momijizukamori and
no subject
Date: 2016-10-03 05:55 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-10-03 05:57 am (UTC)[ it's curt, but he also really means it. he doesn't enjoy being difficult. he wishes he could be over his barriers, that he could speak freely. but if he could do that, he wouldn't need these talks. he hates being a bother, but it seems like he can't help but be one around jim. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-10-03 06:19 am (UTC)Yeah, well, make it up to me by running an extra twenty minutes next lesson.
[ He gave him a teasing smile. ]
And by coming to me next time rather than having me drag you in.
no subject
Date: 2016-10-03 06:23 am (UTC)[ he weakly attempts a joke. he's tried coming to jim - he came after charles, he came after sascha. but he can't guarantee he'll come next time, or the time after that. it all depends on how vulnerable the subject makes him feel, how comfortable he is with voicing it. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-10-03 06:28 am (UTC)This time.
[ He was quiet a moment, watching him. ]
I know this is hard for you. But I'm glad you talked to me.
no subject
Date: 2016-10-03 06:34 am (UTC)Thanks for not giving up on me.
[ he knows he's giving him plenty of reasons to. but it's that very reason that made him so attached to jim. he doesn't give him anything but friendship in return, jim doesn't need him to make anything for him, do anything for him, and he still cares. it means the world to him, and little by little, he's starting to believe that it can stay that way, it can hold, that hanging around him can be incentive enough to hang around him. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-10-06 04:13 am (UTC)You keep thanking me for that, but you don't have to, you know. I'm not in the habit of giving up on my friends.
[ He gave him an encouraging smile as he drained his glass, reaching for the bottle to refill it - a half measure, this time, rather than the full, though he was nowhere near drunk or even tipsy at this point. ]
Now, what do you need moving forward? Do you have lube? What about condoms?
no subject
Date: 2016-10-06 06:31 pm (UTC)[ he shrugs and half-gags half-snorts.
he's not sure if he wants to ask questions, sass, or road runnerer out of here. the struggle is the realest. ]
Is this a future thing or a you thing?
no subject
Date: 2016-10-06 06:46 pm (UTC)This is me making sure you have what you need to have a good time and stay safe. You've never been with a guy - until now - and it's different and since you probably won't ask me, I decided to offer.
[ If he was Bones, Remy, or Spock he would have laughed and joked. But Winn was his friend, in a different way from those two. He was protective of him, very much in the sense of a little brother, so these things came out. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-10-06 06:54 pm (UTC)We're both healthy and we're always safe. [ look the atroma is weird and they can do crazy things to bodies and basically he is taking no chances here. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-10-10 04:50 am (UTC)Hmm, all right. Just be careful and have fun, okay? And don't think to hard on this.
[ He reached out and rapped his knuckles against Winn's hair.]
That's one of your worst habits, you know. Just let yourself enjoy it, and it'll work itself out.
no subject
Date: 2016-10-10 07:12 am (UTC)I'll try, but, you know, old habits. [ trying for a little smile ]
no subject
Date: 2016-10-20 05:34 am (UTC)You're a young enough dog I think you can learn more than a few new tricks.
[ He waggled his brows at him. ]