But you do have her, Winn. You have her, Kitty, me - all the friends you've
made here. You are not alone, Winn. And if he does show up? You're still
not alone. I will defend you against him, just like I know Kara and Kitty
will.
[ He gave Winn another squeeze, knowing that what he was saying was a
touch hypocritical, but it didn't matter so long as it helped Winn. ]
You can't linger on the things that did not happen or might have. The fact
is they didn't, Winn - and that's what matters.
[ he knows that for now, he has his friends. he also knows that those friends - could very easily taken away by the atroma. but that's not what matters right now - it might be what matters in the heat of the moment - but right now, what matters is that he doesn't just know in his heart that they'd be there for him because - that's who they are, they're heroes, they'd protect anyone. what matters to him is hearing out loud that they'd be there for him, specifically, because he's worth it, he's worth fighting for. ]
Thanks, Jim. [ he offers a small smile that's not quite all there. he's still weighed by a lot of guilt, a lot of fears, and a lot of things he hasn't talked about yet. but for the moment - he's a lot happier, too. ] You're right, I do feel better talking about it.
[ Kirk would never tell anyone they weren't worth fighting for. He had
fought for people he couldn't even understand, even gotten in trouble for
it, but he fought because it was the right thing to do. And Winn was his
friend. Of course he would fight for him. Frankly, at this point, if he
ever saw Winn's father he'd clock him no questions asked.
He gives Winn's arm a squeeze, figuring that was enough to get out of Winn
for the moment. It was good he had spoken, and he was glad he had, but
pushing to far could be damaging too. At least he hoped Winn knew he could
come talk to him anytime now, and he hoped he would speak with that Charles
man again. A thirty minute talk couldn't undo years of trauma. He knew
that. But he liked to hope it helped. ]
Good. And I'm sorry I pushed so hard before. I really do trust you, but I
also want you to stay healthy and safe too.
And when you want to talk again - just let me know.
[ nobody needs to tell winn he's not worth it, enough people have in his life to hammer that message in. it's why reactions like jim's, they always take him a little bit by surprise, and he always appreciates them more than he could ever say.
he smiles a little and shakes his head. ]
It's ok, I get it. I do. I get where you're coming from. But uh, I should probably tell you that what works on me - [ they were having a good talk. he wants to end it here, end on a high note. but kara's his best friend and she asked him to tell kirk not to treat her like a child. he can't not do it. but boy, he wishes he could and it shows. but jim just spoke honestly out of concern for him, and that's exactly what he's doing too - he doesn't want to see him and kara start to rip apart over a misunderstanding. ] doesn't really work on Kara. She's kinda been feeling like...well, like you don't trust her, like you're treating her like a child, like you're against her having powers. I told her -- that's not how it is, that you've helped us - me - with the blueprints. But. Maybe you could find another way to voice your concerns? Kara needs to be believed in, and I know you have no way of knowing this cuz you've never seen her in action -- but she really does know what she's doing. She's trained, and she's precise. And she'd never do anything to hurt us. [ those his faith in her may be a touch blinding. ]
[ Kirk raises his eyebrows when Winn brings up this subject, scrunching his brow as he tried to think on what he might have said to cause Kara to think that. He had gotten a little nervous about the laser eyes she mentioned, but not for lack of trust. He would be wary with anyone who had that ability or a weapon like that on the ship, not just Kara, and he had no problem with her other powers. Sure he had teased her about the super strength and breaking the door, but he hadn't though it was enough to make her think he thought her a child. ]
I don't think she would do anything to hurt us, Winn. She never struck me as the sort that would - she's a good person. It's not that I don't trust her, it's just that I would like some things to be approached with caution. I'm aware she has powers, and I'm sure she can control them - it's just certain ones I would prefer not be used on the ship. She said she had laser vision, and while I know she's not about to go boiling a hole in the hull for kicks, I would simply prefer it not be used on the ship. Accidents happen, Winn, and I mean this with greatest respect - but expecting Kara to be able to contain the situation in the event of a ship explosion or hull breach on her own is not only, I think, putting a lot of pressure on Kara - but gross negligence on my part as a captain to ensure the safety of everyone on this ship.
It's why I asked you to make sure everyone was alerted if something happens to Project Plato. I think it is in the best interest of everyone on this ship, for their safety, that she not use a power like that unless we really, really need it.
I'll see about having another talk with her. I didn't mean to make her feel like I don't trust her, or don't believe in her, but I have to think about what's best for the entire ship and the best ways to avoid potentially fatal incidents and need those concerns and measures to be taken seriously.
[ There was no guarantee, after all, that Atroma wouldn't let the ship blow up, use it and their deaths to get better "ratings", or some other twisted purpose. It was to much of a risk. ]
I understand where you're coming from, I do. I know that's not how you meant it, I'm telling you how she heard it. I just -- look I just think she'd be a lot more open to what you're saying if she knows it's coming from a source that does believe in her, does trust her, that's all. I told her -- that she's not being singled out that you come to me with your concerns about my inventions too, just. [ his hand goes up in his hair; he's not really sure what to tell jim to do here. he's never mastered the art of giving kara crit. that's alex's job. ] She knows she needs to be careful, she does, just like I do. We know what we're doing is dangerous. But she's feeling helpless as it is without her powers, stuck here with the rest of us when she's - used to saving the day. And when you tell her she can't do this or that, it all adds up. Just - she already knows she needs to be careful. What she needs to know now is that her friend believes that she will be.
[ He sucked his lip, seeing Winn's point. He could have communicated
better, but it was sometimes hard to step back and talk like they were
friends rather than the captain-crew relationship. It came naturally when
it concerned the safety of the ship and her people, and in all honesty,
looking back, his choice of words had probably been poor. He felt guilty
that he had made Kara believe he doubted her, though he wasn't sorry for
his attempts to encourage safe practices either. Had he been better, he
would have realized what Winn did. She had even told him she had been
without her powers for awhile, even though Kirk was sure no powers was
actually species normal for her. But that wasn't the point. The point was
he had probably come across as an ass, and at the least owed Kara an
apology for that. ]
[ winn's known her for two years, two years in which she was the center of his universe. he learned to read between her lines better than most.
he nods, finally putting his hand down, with a small grateful smile and a lot of anxiety hoping -- he said the right thing, he didn't say too much, that he didn't accidentally make things worse with his good intentions. ]
Thanks, Captain. [ he pats his shoulder and lets his hand drop again. ok. so he should go before this conversation somehow starts centering around his childhood or something, shouldn't he? ] Right - I'm gonna go now. But uh - I'll bring your communicator back in like, 10-15 minutes, and just have everyone else drops their by. [ he nods ] Good talk.
All right, I'll make the announcement to the rest of the crew. And Winn -
please get at least six hours, just to humor me, won't you?
[ See, he was compromising. Not eight, but at least six, all right? He
really was concerned for his health, and he didn't want Winn's work to
suffer due to reduced brain function from lack of sleep. ]
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momijizukamori and
Re: action;
Date: 2016-06-06 06:53 am (UTC)But you do have her, Winn. You have her, Kitty, me - all the friends you've made here. You are not alone, Winn. And if he does show up? You're still not alone. I will defend you against him, just like I know Kara and Kitty will.
[ He gave Winn another squeeze, knowing that what he was saying was a touch hypocritical, but it didn't matter so long as it helped Winn. ]
You can't linger on the things that did not happen or might have. The fact is they didn't, Winn - and that's what matters.
action;
Date: 2016-06-06 07:04 am (UTC)Thanks, Jim. [ he offers a small smile that's not quite all there. he's still weighed by a lot of guilt, a lot of fears, and a lot of things he hasn't talked about yet. but for the moment - he's a lot happier, too. ] You're right, I do feel better talking about it.
Re: action;
Date: 2016-06-07 05:48 am (UTC)[ Kirk would never tell anyone they weren't worth fighting for. He had fought for people he couldn't even understand, even gotten in trouble for it, but he fought because it was the right thing to do. And Winn was his friend. Of course he would fight for him. Frankly, at this point, if he ever saw Winn's father he'd clock him no questions asked.
He gives Winn's arm a squeeze, figuring that was enough to get out of Winn for the moment. It was good he had spoken, and he was glad he had, but pushing to far could be damaging too. At least he hoped Winn knew he could come talk to him anytime now, and he hoped he would speak with that Charles man again. A thirty minute talk couldn't undo years of trauma. He knew that. But he liked to hope it helped. ]
Good. And I'm sorry I pushed so hard before. I really do trust you, but I also want you to stay healthy and safe too.
And when you want to talk again - just let me know.
action;
Date: 2016-06-07 05:58 am (UTC)he smiles a little and shakes his head. ]
It's ok, I get it. I do. I get where you're coming from. But uh, I should probably tell you that what works on me - [ they were having a good talk. he wants to end it here, end on a high note. but kara's his best friend and she asked him to tell kirk not to treat her like a child. he can't not do it. but boy, he wishes he could and it shows. but jim just spoke honestly out of concern for him, and that's exactly what he's doing too - he doesn't want to see him and kara start to rip apart over a misunderstanding. ] doesn't really work on Kara. She's kinda been feeling like...well, like you don't trust her, like you're treating her like a child, like you're against her having powers. I told her -- that's not how it is, that you've helped us - me - with the blueprints. But. Maybe you could find another way to voice your concerns? Kara needs to be believed in, and I know you have no way of knowing this cuz you've never seen her in action -- but she really does know what she's doing. She's trained, and she's precise. And she'd never do anything to hurt us. [ those his faith in her may be a touch blinding. ]
action;
Date: 2016-06-07 06:13 am (UTC)I don't think she would do anything to hurt us, Winn. She never struck me as the sort that would - she's a good person. It's not that I don't trust her, it's just that I would like some things to be approached with caution. I'm aware she has powers, and I'm sure she can control them - it's just certain ones I would prefer not be used on the ship. She said she had laser vision, and while I know she's not about to go boiling a hole in the hull for kicks, I would simply prefer it not be used on the ship. Accidents happen, Winn, and I mean this with greatest respect - but expecting Kara to be able to contain the situation in the event of a ship explosion or hull breach on her own is not only, I think, putting a lot of pressure on Kara - but gross negligence on my part as a captain to ensure the safety of everyone on this ship.
It's why I asked you to make sure everyone was alerted if something happens to Project Plato. I think it is in the best interest of everyone on this ship, for their safety, that she not use a power like that unless we really, really need it.
I'll see about having another talk with her. I didn't mean to make her feel like I don't trust her, or don't believe in her, but I have to think about what's best for the entire ship and the best ways to avoid potentially fatal incidents and need those concerns and measures to be taken seriously.
[ There was no guarantee, after all, that Atroma wouldn't let the ship blow up, use it and their deaths to get better "ratings", or some other twisted purpose. It was to much of a risk. ]
action;
Date: 2016-06-07 06:24 am (UTC)I understand where you're coming from, I do. I know that's not how you meant it, I'm telling you how she heard it. I just -- look I just think she'd be a lot more open to what you're saying if she knows it's coming from a source that does believe in her, does trust her, that's all. I told her -- that she's not being singled out that you come to me with your concerns about my inventions too, just. [ his hand goes up in his hair; he's not really sure what to tell jim to do here. he's never mastered the art of giving kara crit. that's alex's job. ] She knows she needs to be careful, she does, just like I do. We know what we're doing is dangerous. But she's feeling helpless as it is without her powers, stuck here with the rest of us when she's - used to saving the day. And when you tell her she can't do this or that, it all adds up. Just - she already knows she needs to be careful. What she needs to know now is that her friend believes that she will be.
Re: action;
Date: 2016-06-07 06:32 am (UTC)[ He sucked his lip, seeing Winn's point. He could have communicated better, but it was sometimes hard to step back and talk like they were friends rather than the captain-crew relationship. It came naturally when it concerned the safety of the ship and her people, and in all honesty, looking back, his choice of words had probably been poor. He felt guilty that he had made Kara believe he doubted her, though he wasn't sorry for his attempts to encourage safe practices either. Had he been better, he would have realized what Winn did. She had even told him she had been without her powers for awhile, even though Kirk was sure no powers was actually species normal for her. But that wasn't the point. The point was he had probably come across as an ass, and at the least owed Kara an apology for that. ]
I'll talk with her. I promise - Captain's honor.
action;
Date: 2016-06-07 06:39 am (UTC)he nods, finally putting his hand down, with a small grateful smile and a lot of anxiety hoping -- he said the right thing, he didn't say too much, that he didn't accidentally make things worse with his good intentions. ]
Thanks, Captain. [ he pats his shoulder and lets his hand drop again. ok. so he should go before this conversation somehow starts centering around his childhood or something, shouldn't he? ] Right - I'm gonna go now. But uh - I'll bring your communicator back in like, 10-15 minutes, and just have everyone else drops their by. [ he nods ] Good talk.
Re: action;
Date: 2016-06-10 04:45 am (UTC)All right, I'll make the announcement to the rest of the crew. And Winn - please get at least six hours, just to humor me, won't you?
[ See, he was compromising. Not eight, but at least six, all right? He really was concerned for his health, and he didn't want Winn's work to suffer due to reduced brain function from lack of sleep. ]
Good talk.
action;
Date: 2016-06-10 04:04 pm (UTC)Aye aye, captain. I'll try. [ it's all he can promise, really. ]