I do see it. And I'm not trying to excuse it. I'm not. I just...
I want you to understand me. All of me. Where I'm from there was so much violence and fighting all the time. It wasn't just with enemies, you know? We were training and sparring together as a team. A family too, and it was hard to express emotions but there was that outlet and I know it's twisted and backwards but so much got driven into it and I know it's not how to act now. But it still feels that way sometimes.
It doesn't make it right, but do you get that at all? [She's not trying to blame him here. She understands if he has trouble with it. She had some good years as a child that makes it easier for her to relate, but how can you really understand the bleak, constant danger until you've lived it? But she does believe in him and she wants to believe that he'll try for her. Because he loves her.] That it's different for me? That just because the world changed around me doesn't mean I could change just as suddenly?
[And ironically, if Sascha had been a stranger or someone she already had problems with it would have been easier to hold back. As it was, this was also such a personal betrayal. And while part of her still says pre-Sascha deserved what he got she knows Sascha in no way deserves those memories. And Winn definitely doesn't deserve any of this.]
no subject
I want you to understand me. All of me. Where I'm from there was so much violence and fighting all the time. It wasn't just with enemies, you know? We were training and sparring together as a team. A family too, and it was hard to express emotions but there was that outlet and I know it's twisted and backwards but so much got driven into it and I know it's not how to act now. But it still feels that way sometimes.
It doesn't make it right, but do you get that at all? [She's not trying to blame him here. She understands if he has trouble with it. She had some good years as a child that makes it easier for her to relate, but how can you really understand the bleak, constant danger until you've lived it? But she does believe in him and she wants to believe that he'll try for her. Because he loves her.] That it's different for me? That just because the world changed around me doesn't mean I could change just as suddenly?
[And ironically, if Sascha had been a stranger or someone she already had problems with it would have been easier to hold back. As it was, this was also such a personal betrayal. And while part of her still says pre-Sascha deserved what he got she knows Sascha in no way deserves those memories. And Winn definitely doesn't deserve any of this.]